Zoe Tay’s 5 Life Lessons on Parenting for Every Test

Zoe Tay’s 5 Life Lessons on Parenting for Every Test

 

New year, new school, new opportunities for growth! Read our article as we share some tried and true tips for parents and children in the lead up to the first day of primary school.

A Whole New World Awaits

New classmates, new teachers, new school environment — your child’s tiny world is about to get a lot bigger. With these changes come opportunities for personal, social and cognitive growth.

The Countdown And Preparation Begins

In these weeks as you count down to your child’s first day of school, you may be wondering, “What will school be like for my child? Will my child be able to cope in the new environment?”

Parents can help by being proactive — research from professionals at Duke University suggests that establishing a strong communication channel with your child’s teachers helps and so does monitoring changes in your child's behaviour or mood when he or she first starts school.

Whether at home or in school, we’ve got some great tips for every stage of preparation that will help you (and your child) pave a smooth journey towards the new school term in January.

1. Create A Routine That Works

Studies have shown that routines help children feel safe and secure. Set up a routine that works for your child — whether it’s a shower before dinner or an afternoon snack before naptime, it’s important that your child gets into a routine that he or she is comfortable with. 

2. Identify Friendly Figures In School

Helping your child identify teachers or staff he or she can go to for assistance is important. When your child recognises trustworthy figures of authority, he or she will feel more secure in the new environment.

Related Article: Gear Up For Primary 1

3. Prepare An 'Emergency' Fund

You may want to consider setting aside an “emergency fund” for your child. Placing extra money in a separate wallet or purse to be kept in his or her school bag means that your child will still have access to money if he or she misplaces pocket money. However, you should set some strict rules about when this money can be used.

4. Test Out That Transport Route

It may be a good idea to have a few dry runs of your child’s journey to and from school to help your child familiarise himself or herself with the route. Help your child identify key landmarks and remember the specific place where he or she will be dropped off or picked up from everyday.

Related Article: Raising A Responsible Child

5. Set Mini Goals To Achieve Together

Help to make the experience seem less daunting by setting mini goals for the first day of school. Start with small tasks like “Leave the house on time” or “Remember to bring my water bottle home” or “Meet one new friend in class today”. These mini goals give your child something to look forward to on his or her first day of school!

Download Our Special Guide To Surviving And Thriving In Primary 1

The Learning Lab would like to extend our help as you and your child are preparing for Primary 1 and the new adventures that lie ahead. Download our fun and informative guide filled with 25 great tips to help your child survive and thrive in Primary 1!

 

As my sons grow older and progress through school, I watch them spend much of their time preparing for different tests and quizzes.

And I do see the value in these tests — they help my sons (and me) understand how well they are learning in school. They give me a sense of what help they may need so that as a parent, I can find ways of giving them the support they need.

However, when I watched TLL’s video, it really made me think about all the other tests my sons have faced (and will continue to face) as they grow up. And as a mother, I want to do everything I can to make sure they are ready to face these life tests as well.

Here are 5 life lessons for my sons that I’d like to share with you in this guide:

  • Facing the Test of Academic Assessments
    Life lesson on being resilient

  • Facing the Test of Disappointment
    Life lesson on being fearless

  • Facing the Test of Meeting Others' Expectation
    Life lesson on being confident

  • Facing the Test of "Being the Bigger Person"
    Life lesson on having respect for others

  • Facing the Test of Change
    Life lesson on being open-minded

 

1. Facing the Test of Academic Assessments


Each of my sons has a different attitude towards their studies. This means that when the exam season comes around, I have to parent each of them differently too.

When children are preparing for exams and assessments, they may feel challenged by the amount of work they have to revise or by the high expectations they have of themselves. This is where we, as parents, have an important role to play in sharing advice.


Life lesson on being resilient

I like to help my sons be mentally prepared by encouraging them look at the bigger picture. While I do emphasise that it is important to revise and to try their best, it is more important to understand that setbacks are part and parcel of learning. And even when my sons do not score well at the exams, I always remind them to focus on learning from their mistakes so that they can improve and do better in the next one.

I want my sons to see that it is far more important to be resilient in learning a new topic, mastering a new skill or achieving a new goal than to always be “right” or be “the best”. In my own experiences, I have found that having a sense of resilience helped me to overcome challenges and setbacks in my career too.


2. Facing the Test of Disappointment


Disappointments can come in many forms. I’ve shared with my sons that disappointments may come in the form of a friend or family member letting them down, not being able to achieve what they set out to do, or even not receiving an award or prize in a school competition.

How can we help our children manage these negative emotions?

The first step, I tell my sons, is that they have to recognise and accept their feelings. It is okay to feel disappointed, but what’s important is how they react to the people around them and the situation they are in. I encourage them to look beyond their emotions, so they can speak to others with sincerity and take the time to understand what they can do differently to avoid the same disappointment in the future.


Life lesson on being fearless

I don’t want my sons to be held back by the fear of disappointment. I want them to take chances on their dreams and talents and to try new experiences so they can continue to grow and discover more about themselves. This is something I have learnt in my own experiences too.

Taking on different types of roles in my career has allowed me to hone my craft as an actress. Helping our children be fearless in areas of potential growth is a big part of empowering them to succeed.

 

3. Facing the Test of Meeting Others’ Expectations


This is a tricky one. As parents, we may not realise it, but our children have to handle the pressure of expectations from many people around them. In school, they are expected to behave in certain ways. In the classroom, they are expected to learn using certain methods and at a certain speed. At home, we have expectations for them too. While these expectations are put in place to help them learn and grow, they can end up being intimidating for our children.


Life lesson on being confident

My sons have often heard me tell them that facing others’ expectations is an unavoidable part of life. And it is true. Sometimes, when we want to live up to others’ expectations, we forget to give ourselves the space and time to achieve our goals in our own time.

While it’s important to recognise that others’ expectations can be sources of motivation for us to keep on achieving more, it is also essential that my sons know they should be confident in pursuing whatever they set out to do. They should have the confidence to try their best — nothing less and nothing more. And if the outcomes do not meet every single person’s expectations, that’s okay, too.


Exclusive Guide: Zoe Tay's Lesson on Parenting for Every Tests

Download the special guide we have prepared to learn more about the rest of the lessons that Zoe Tay would like to share with you. We've also included a useful checklist to help you guide your child through different life's tests. 

Simply click on the link below to download your guide now.

There are tests and there are tests.

While every parent may do things differently, our goals are all the same — to help our children be ready for school and for life. If you are looking for an education partner who understands how important this is, you can find out more about The Learning Lab’s range of programmes (from N2 to JC2).

All three of my sons are with The Learning Lab and they are enjoying their lessons. Every week, they are eager to share what they’ve learnt and they have a real interest in learning. As a mum, I can see that they are becoming more confident, happy learners. And that’s a real joy for a mum to see.

You can find out more about TLL's programmes below.


The Learning Lab is now at 9 locations. Find a location that suits your needs.

If you have any questions about our programmes, please email us at enquiry@thelearninglab.com.sg or call us at 6733 8711 and we will be happy to assist you.